My Fiancée Thinks I’m Gay Because I Send ‘Dick Pics’ To Buddies, Breaks Off Engagement

A 28-year-old man has taken to Reddit seeking advice after his fiancée broke off their engagement because she thinks he is secretly gay.

He claims she discovered he had been in a “dick pic war” with his straight buddies after borrowing his phone and began using “some pretty homophobic slurs” before leaving him.

He writes:

Throwaway because I’m embarrassed. For background, I have a group of 4 buddies (27-28M) from college that I hang out and text with regularly. I have been dating my fiancee, Alice (30F) for 2 years and just proposed last month. My fiance and my buddies get along well and like each other. So this story begins about 3 years ago when one of my buddies, Kevin (28M) went on a vacation. He was texting us back pictures from his journey – mostly benign stuff: selfies with a beer, pics of landscapes, etc. Where he was at there were a lot of wild animals. As a joke, Kevin texted us a picture of a horse’s penis. He was really laughing it up and making fun of us for looking at that picture.
Naturally, we got pretty riled up and hatched a plot to get back at him. Now, I am somewhat infamous amongst our friend group for sending out dick pics pretty early to girls I’m dating or want to date. So the plan was for me to text him a dick pic in retaliation. A bunch of my buddies live in the same house as Kevin so we had easy access to his room. I laid my flaccid penis and balls on his desk and sent him a pic of it with the comment “you showed me yours, here’s mine” or something like that. He got pretty angry about that and many laughs were had by all. We didn’t think that he would strike back, but he did.

Over the next couple of years, our friend group has essentially been sending dick pics back and forth as a form of trash talk. For example, when I beat them all in fantasy football and was bragging about it in our group message, I received multiple dick pics. We colloquially refer to it as the dick pic war.



About a year after the initial horse incident, I began dating my current GF. It’s the best relationship of my life so far. We almost never fight and when we do, we don’t yell and generally work together to resolve our problems. We had our biggest fight on Sunday night and I’m not sure we’ll be able to get over it. What happened is my friend Kevin is a Golden state warriors fan and I like OKC (teams are playing each other right now in NBA playoffs). So I was trash talking him about how they lost and how one of their players knee’d mine in the groin. My GF, Alice, needed to use my phone as a remote for our Roku TV and she noticed that he sent me a picture in return. It was a dick pic.

She said something like “what….” and got really quiet and scrolled up to where I had sent him a dick pic about a week prior. She got really mad and started accusing me of being gay. I tried explaining the whole thing, but she wouldn’t believe it. My main piece of evidence was that I was sending flaccid dick pics and told her to compare to the ones that I sent her which were all erect. I also offered to get my friends to corroborate my side of the story. She doesn’t even want to talk to them, or me any more and she left to stay with a friend. She said some pretty hurtful things like how I never really loved her and that she was just a “beard” to me. She even used some pretty homophobic slurs which is very out of character for her.

I dont know how to effectively communicate my side of the story to her, so I’m asking reddit for help. Obviously, I’ll stop sending dick pics and ask my friends to as well. But, what can I do to repair my relationship at this point?

tl;dr : male friend sent me a dick pic as a joke. I retaliated with one of my own and we have been sending dick pics as a form of insults ever since. Fiancee was using my phone and accidentally received a dick pic meant for me and now thinks I’m gay and our whole relationship is a sham.

One redditor advises: “Get one of your friends to reach out to her directly and explain it. One who was involved in everything. If they have the full documented history of the messages, even better. It creates a track record to back up the story. There’s really nothing else you can do if she won’t listen/talk to you.
If you can get her to at least listen to you, offer her the opportunity to look through anything she wants… your phone, internet history, whatever. Anything that will help make her feel more comfortable.”

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Share your advice below in the comments section.

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